Mixed Emotions


My mind told me to be happy since Nel got a chance to go outside the country. Many opportunities will surely open up for him. My heart told me to be sad because I will surely miss him, every hour, every minute and every second…

Now I know how it feels like to be away with the person that I love. I have friends that experienced the same and I thought before that I understood them and it will be easy to cope. I thought wrong, now I understand what it feels like… how heartbreaking it is. I can’t help it, I truly miss Nel. I’m like a person with a huge hole in my heart. My friend Eda told me that I have to go through the process of missing him and being away from me for me to full cope up in the end. I’m so lucky to have friends who made me do stuff to be occupied and not think of him.

However, before I close my eyes, I still long for him… 27 hours passed and I know I will never get over this. And when I woke up, I still miss him. It’s like I will be missing him for a long time… 

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